What kind of people are your calibre, those in your league?
This is a part I love about this chapter! For your life purpose to sparkle, you need to attract “sparkling” companionship to journey through life with you. These are the people with whom you share similar values. They will not hurt you; they will be your cheerleaders, since they know how important it is for you to live a purposeful life. People of your calibre will not feel intimidated or threatened by you. They will never be envious of your achievements, but instead, they will market your life purpose whenever they get an opportunity to do so, wherever they are, even if you are not part of such an audience. Unlike “the others”, people of your calibre, don’t need you to be present to speak well of you.
People of your calibre do not just love you, but they also care about you. This you see by their sincere life-giving words and actions towards you. Since they do not feel threatened by you or try to change your boundaries, they accept that as people we are different in so many ways, including our ideologies and desires. A person who expects you to aspire for things that they also want, a person who get angry or distant when you follow your heart is off your league. While people of your calibre differ from you in generic life preferences, they are eager and interested in learning and understanding your life preferences. This they do because deep inside, they wish for you what you wish for yourself. They safeguard your noble heart’s desires to the extent that if they can, they want to make your heart desires a reality. Isn’t that marvellous?
So, while you might have big dreams that feel like a fairy-tale, people in your league might not understand your life vision and mission, or necessarily agree with what you want for that matter, but because they believe in you, they will respect your boundaries without influencing you into diminishing your light. Regardless of their imperfections, such people are always willing to listen to you. They might not agree with you, but they voice their opinions with love, courtesy, and kindness.
They will never overlook your existence. Yet those people who are an enemy to your life purpose do not even “notice” when you have entered a room that they already occupy. Shining your life purpose requires a shining network. You need to have mercy on your inner person by finding people who will either reflect your light or shine their own. The question is, who are you currently journeying through life with? Be cautious of attracting the wrong people into your life purpose. Ensure that you’ll only attract people who will not force you to walk on eggshells, because that is the biggest threat to your life purpose survival. Since I am an opinionated person, I am more inclined to people who will naturally provide me with freedom of speech. People of your calibre will naturally create an environment where you are free to express your opinions without worrying that you’ll be perceived as rude or bossy.
People of your calibre will not cause you to moderate your thought processes or feelings about life aspects that may endanger your life purpose just because they have scratchy feelings and egos. People of your calibre accept you just the way you are. When with them, you do not need to be like a chameleon to make them accept you. Same as, you’ll have no need to “play small” so that they can feel like you are all “equal”. No! Instead, people of your calibre will push you to your furthest limits ever. They will challenge you to think outside the box and enhance your life purpose. They will make you lough even when life is grim. Although you might not be that “important”, they help you be a better version of yourself, ensuring that you are not merely happy, but have acquired joyful. How beautiful is this? You feel safe and heard when you are around people of your calibre.
We need to hang around people who pour water on the fires of our fears and throw fuel on the passions of our dream. – Kris Vallotton
The truth is, they are hard to find, but they exist. You’ll only find people of your calibre when you have acquired Spirituality and competence worth. I believe that it is only through a healthy relationship with God that you will be directed towards people of your league. Do not despair, one day you’ll find them. I am also still patiently hunting for more of them -J.
LILITHA
(Dr Bongiwe Mali-Swelindawo)
This article is abstracted from one of her self-help books:
A Life Purpose Unveils Endless Joy (Vol. 2)